‘Мысли из лени’ Андрея Белого (Из дневника философских мыслей)

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  • Russian Literature L VIII (2005) 85-92 www.elsevier.com/locate/ruslit Elsevier

    'MblCJIH H3 JIEHH' AHf[PEIt BEJIOFO (H3 flktEBHHKA cbHJIOCOebCKI/IX MblCJ1EI~)

    AJIECCAH]]~PO KOMEJISIH

    IIy6n11Kyegbxfi qbparMenT xpaHnTCa a pyKonacnoM oTaeae Poccllf icKofl Fo - cyaapcTBeaao~ 6t~6mtoTeKrt B MOCKBe B qboHae A11apea Benoro (~. 25. On. 3. )~. 15). 3xo 6eaoBofi a~xorpa~ c BsmeceHnsrM ~ naqano 3arnaalleM - 'Ms ,can 143 neat4', 11 noanl lc~m aBTOpa a rotate . TeKCT pa3aeaeH na abe qacTn, Kazan 143 KoTop~rx aaT11poBalla - COOTBeTcTBeHHO 2-SIM 11 3-11M mOHa nO aOBOMy CTnmO (20-21-ro Man eTaporo ~a~enaap~). Foa He yra3aH, no MO~HO yraepatolaTs aOCTaTO~140 TOqHO, ~TO na14ncaH on noc~e peaoa~o- a1414, cKopee acero a 1918 r. 06 aTOM CB11aeTem, CTBymT ynoM11HaeM~,~e np14MeTS~ apeuenH: "repe14r14", HOBb~fi KaaeHaap~, a TaK)re uHoroq14caeH- able n 6ecnoneal lbie "3aceaaHna" pa3sxnqnb~x KOM11CCltH, B KOTOpbFx BenbN HpaH11Ma.~ yqacT11e aSLq TOrO, tlTO6t,I rlOJIyq11Tt, HpaBo Ha rIaeK, BIIJIOTB aO CBOefi 3~vmnrpaulln n FepManmo B 1921 r. OqeBnal lo, a~ro 3aecb 11MeeTca B B11ay pa6oTa n11caTesm B HapxoMnpoce 11 apyrnx COBeTCKI~X y,ape>role1414ax.

    Ha-sa pas6rXBK14 14y6a11KyeMoro qbparMenTa no anaM MO~KHO Hpeano- aO~11Tb, '~TO Mrs1 nMeeM aeno c Kyc0"aKOM HeKoero yTpaqeH11oro zneB14mca ii11caTeng. O cymeCTBOBaH1411 raroro aHeBHUKa CB11~IeTeYILCTByeT, 13 qaCTHOC- TH, ~pyFofi COXpan11BmllfiC~ ~parMe14T 3TOFO BpeMeH11, OXBaTbIBalO14111fi I ie- p110a C 29-ro MapTa 17o 7-oe anpena 1919 r. B HeM aHeBHHKOBOMy ~aHpy COOTBeTCTBylOT 14 CT11JIb 3an14cefi, 11 yHOM11HaH11n 0 KawQIoaHeBHIolX, Tegy- gI14X CO6b~T~WA, 0 BcTpeqax 11 pa~roBopax c pa3JIHqH~,rMH JIrOar~MH. OaHat(o B ny6St11KyeMOM HaMH qbparMeHTe MBI CTanKHBaeMCll C ItBJIeH11eM 14Horo maHpa 11 1411oro CT11rta (6ostee Br~IaypHoro, pasMepennoro, ~naocoqbcKoro). Tpya l lo I/oBep11Tt, B TO, qTO 'Mt,ICJI11 tt3 JIeH11' IIBJII/tOTCll qaCT~,tO TOFO )Ke caMoro

    0304-3479/05/$ - see front matter 2005 Published by Elsevier B.V. doi: 10.1016/j.ruslit.2005.07.006

  • 86 A:leccanc)po Io~4eaau

    6OJIbmOro TeKCTa, H3 KOTOpOro Bb{rIaJI H yrlOMI~HaBraI14I~CZ BbI14Ie qbparMertT 1919 r. Ec~H 'M~xcaH n3 aenn ' ~ ItB3"DIIOTCJt )IHeBHttKOM, TO )IHeBHHKOM TBopqeCKHM.

    'MbIC~H ~3 ~en14' ragyTc~ ham qb14~OCO~CrO-~14TepaTypuLnU pa3M~l- iiI~em~eM, rle6osmmaM oqepKOM, MO~eT 6blTb, 14eaaKO14qeHHr~IM. 3TO Mornl~ 6blTb 14a6pocKn r qbenr~eTony, KoTopu~ Bem, I~ naaHnpoBaa rIarlettaTaTl, a rarOM-JlItgO I~epnojI14qecroM r~32IaHn14, B myp14a~e 14J~r~ ra3eTe, Hanoao614e Tex, qTO ne~aTa~ B Eupatceabtx aeOo.,rtocmax B rieprio)i npo~14BaH14a B II IBe~- uap1414.

    1-Io caoeuy co~ep~aH14~ 14 nponcxox

  • 'Mbzc~u u3 :tenu' AnOpen BeJ~oeo 87

    )IBH}KeHIIH II0 IIyTH, Be~ymeMy K CaMOCO3HaHHIO. 1-IO MHeHHIO IIHCaTena, pennri lo3Hbi~ Kpn314c 3analmo~ KynhTypLI, 3arpoHysmnn~ 14 Poccmo B X IX - XX BB., MOXHO IlpeoxoJIeTb TOJIbKO g IloMoml~IO HH~HHCKO~ f~b14YIOCOflbHH. BMecTe C HeKOT0pblMil ~pyF14MH CHMBOIIHGTaM14 14 qbHYIOCOqba.MH cBoero BpeMeHH, 13easlI~ IlOSlaraJI, qTo 14~en KapMLI H peHHKapHalLH14 MOI'yT 6hlTb coe~HHeHI~I C xp14CTHaHCKO~ BepoI~ Il CTaTI, OCHOBOH ~Jl~I ee H3Me14eHH~I.

    B 'Ms lcn~x H3 JIeHH' Benslfi IlpOT14BOI/OGTaBYL*IeT pa6oTy 14 3aHIITOCTB )IenaMrI 6naxe14HO~ IIp0B~HOCT14, Iio~qepK14BaeT orpo iHoe noJIoXilTe3II~Boe 3HaqeHile ilocJie~Hefi. )Ke~laH~le ripoxilTl, BeCb ~e14I~ B CnOKO~CTB~I~I, 3a6bI- Ba,q O nOBCeJIHeBHI~IX TpeBorax H 06~3aH14OCTJtX -- BOT coKpOBeHHoe xeylaHHe JIeHTJ/~I, KOTOpOe aBTop qbparMeI-iTa IIOJIHOCTI, IO IIO~ep~K14BaeT. JIeHl~ laO3BO- Y/J~eT eMy lIpeo)/oYleTl, 6er ceKyH~, MHHyT, qacoB, BpeMeHH Boo6me, IIOpBaTl~ C 14pomn~Ii Il OTBJIeHbC~I OT 6y~ymero, ~OCT14qI~ a6COYIIOTHOFO ClIOKOHCTB14fl

    - - KaK BHemHero, TaK I4 BHyTpeHaero -- H HacYla:a~aTl, C~I HM B HOYIHO~ iepe . "Ky~I~T" nemI He aBn~eTca clIelmqbrmofi pyccKofi Kyn~Typ~,I; 3Ta

    Tpa~rlI~n~ Be~eTc~ c aHTIlqHOCTH. Eme I~rli~epoa IIpOT14BOIIOCTaBnmI TO Bpe la , IKe 3iiaTa~Ha,q ilOXBaJia cMepTil. CoBpeMeHHLI~ qeJIOBeK ("~I" C Ma.rleHbKO~ 6yK- BI~I), Ilorpy>KeilHblfi B negotium, ~on}KeH, KaK CqHTaeT Ben~Ifi, oTpe14114TBC~ OT exe~HeBHr, ix 3a6OT, OT Bcex CTpaCTe~, qVBGTB H }Ke~IaHil~, OT CBOeFO TeJIa - TO eCTt,, qbagTilqecKil, Ilepe~KHTb cMepTB, n pe3yJll~TaTe 3TOFO Oil CMO~KeT OII~yTHTB KOCMIlqeCKylO pea3IBHOCTB Il IIO3HaeT CBOIO KOCMHHeCKylO, 6oxecT- BeHilylo CylILHOCTB, OBOe caMoco3Hmolltee "6onbmoe . . . . H". OqeBil~ilO, qTO, IIpOqepqHBa,q rlyTb qeIIOBeKa qepe3 MeTaqbopilqeCKytO cMepTB K BoBpoXQIe- HHIO B HOBOM 6ox

  • 88 A~eccam)po Io~te~zu

    qTO MaTepHa2IOM ~JLq KapTHH pas~oxeHna ~ CMepTH, CTOJII~ 3KClIpeCCHBHO prlcyeMblX B 'MLic~ax n3 ~eRn', CTO2I 930Tep~qecKr~fi OrlblT Be~oro-aHTpO- llOCO~a, CB~I3aHHLI~ C "BI~Ixo~eHHeM" ti3 CO6CTBeHHOFO TeJIa. ~TOT OIIbIT Be~I~ He0~HOKpaTHO OIIHCblBaJ/, B tlaCTHOCTH, B paccKa3e 'Hor ' , HMe/O/J2eM rleMa~o HepeK~H~IeK C ny6m~yeM~rM qbparieHTOi. OpqborpaqbI~a I~ nyHKTya- IIH~ IIpI4Be~eHI, I K llpaBHJIaM COBpeMeHHOFO pyCCKOFO ~I3l, IKa.

  • 'Mbtcnu u~ aenu' AnOpen Benoeo 89

    AH~PEIYI BEJIbIIYI

    MBIC J IH H3 J IEHH

    K 2 -MY HIOH_,q (20 MASI )

    He IIO6OIIMCa JlelliiZl:,Cal "CJIy~KeH11e My3 He Teplirrr cyeTl, I. ' ' l )~eJI, HacToami lx ~IeJI, y I lac HeT:

    6blTb He Mo)KeT; Bce ~eJia - 3OJIOTO~ ~OH~ 6oraTc'rB - II0~MeI-II, IJIiI MbI "KepeHKaMil", 2 JIeHb -- Heo6xo~IHMa~, HaM lIpe~IcTO~IIIa~ ~eBaJibBa/_ill~, H60 TeMII Hamefi 7KII3HH - - cyeTJIIIBbI~ H "~eJIOBOfi" -- Hac o6peK Ha "6e3~eJn:,e".

    f[eHb -- HeO6XO~iiMOe yCnOB11e ") lena". J-[Hmb KOF~Ia MbI "JIeHllBbl", -- IIOpO~ 3a~KHBaeT B HaC IICTIIHHO 6ec-

    KOpblCTHan MhlCJIB, 6ecKOpblCTHOe qyBCTBO H 6ecKOpblCTHa,q BOJIn; Bce i lpo- nee - yTrlnrlTapHo; Me~111Talma B yCJIOB11aX Hamefi cyeTHOfi ~Krt3HH IIpHXO~11T CBeX11Te~ILHe~ qepe3 JIeHl~.

    Me)mTa lmn - heaL, Bo3Be~eHllan B np11HImn. I~apCTBO Jlen11 -- KO- pa6JIb, OTIIJIbIBaIOIIlll~ B cTpaHbI q i l cTe~mi lx KmleH11~ II ~eaTeJIl~HOCTefI, IlepnellarlI~yJI~pHO ceKyml lx Bce IIJIOCKOCT11 Haml lx >KHTeI~CKIIX cyeT; Jmnl la r lepeceqeHi ln ~ByX IISIOCKOCTe~ l lami ix )IenTeabHOCTefi H eCTb JIHHII~I JIeHH.

    By/IeTe THroe, JIeHHBe~. H - BCIIOMH11M IIOCSlOBIItIy: "T i lme eaemL - aaaLme 6y~em~".

    5t ceroRHa "JIeHIOC~,": n -- MaHK11py~O, n l lpoc l Ian "3aceaaH11n"; He i l ona~y l l l lKyaa, rae MHe HHa~o 6Lm,.

    Ergo: n - MLICmO. CyeTa 113 cyeT, m, ipacTa~oman 113 "~IeJIoBo~", "Tpe3BO~I" mH311ii eCT~,

    M~,ICn~,, qTO "5I" -- TaKOfi, KaKIIM Hecy ce6n qepe3 ~KrI311l, -- He MepTBelL FnylIOCTI, rnynocTe~I ~IyMaTl,, qTO eCTl~ Mlle -- "TaKOMy" -- cnacell I~e, nTO eme He Bce noril6JIO, ~rro He Bce IIyTn K BOSpox~eii i i IO oTpe3am,~ OT Mean.

    Ha 3TOM IIOCTpOenI, I Bce KOMIIpOMHCCbI pe~Illr11~ II M11CT11KII; Ha 3TOM IIOCTpOeH II KOMIIpOM11CC, nOacTepermom11~ Meiln B "ai l ' rpol iocoqbi lr i" ; 3TII MbICJIll cyTI~ "TOK11".

    OT I111x co~tpora~oc~, Ha~ex~ao~ He "5t" -- Tpyn BO Mlle; MOrI ~IepB11 BO Mlle KOlIOmaTca (KonomrtTCn B0 SHe MOa "HepBIIOCTI,") -- KpilqaT: ")K11BI, I MI, I! Eme eCTI~ HaM c l Iacel l l le!"

    5{ - r ior l l6: MblCJIb, qT0 MHe eCTb c l iacel l l le , ra~ii, BaHnB11pyeT "Tpyn" . OH -- 113nlI~eH; MOrt KO~Ka ~aBHO MnOrO e6pomel la ; n ~aBHO OTXIIJI; a

    MOIl o611axenm, ie nepm, i - CyTl, qepBil , aaBl lo 11CTOniiBmiie Tymy MO~O, MOe MnCO, KOTOpOe llarioMlll laeT one ,y , IIOKp~,ITylO Ilapa311TaMH, KOTOpylo ~I~In qero -To Top~KeCTBeHHO BblBeCiiJIIl 11epe)l BceM11 l la 113nmile~me~ BemanKe ( l la ci~eJieTe MOeM).

  • 90 AneccauOpo Ko~ten~u

    I/I3~IlleH BO MHe JIHttIL CKeJIeT; B HeM -- 6eccMepTr le cMepTtt; qepe3 6eccMepTne cMepTrI ; IymeBnof i K 6eccMepTmo )rH3Hn )Iyx0aHOfi: "O; lyme- anenne - o rmcnef imaa no~j lenKa ~yXOBHOCTH."

    YrKacHb~ raa3a MOrt; rony6~,~e Oan -- OW pa3no~nBme~ca KpOBn; qboc- qbopnqecrnfi 6neck nx B o~lymeBnnrOL~ne MHHyTI~I ecxb m,l)leJieHrle 6OJIOX- noro ra3a, ueTarla: ero ornn, ero 6necKn! Hrpa 3paqKOB -- Konomamnec~, qepHen~KHe roYlOBI(tI ~IByX Tpynn~rx qepse~ - ) lone~ uo3ra - 3anon3mnx B FYla3HHIIbI: ecJIri rna3a MOrt CO6JIa3H~IIOT qbaYlI~IIIHBOI~ )IyXOBHOCT]bIO, -- BblpBaTb 6hi ItX! Ho HpeKpacHSI ao Mile weurlO-JIOHttl~Ie Bna;IHHSI qeper~a.

    MbI - )IeTH Karma: aatu nyTb -- Fn6enb; aa, /(TO-HH6y~It, H3 norn6nyB- IIIHX, H BOCKpeCHeT, 6I~ITb Mo~KeT; CTpOHTb UbICJIH O TOM, qTO BOCrpecHy, 6bITb uo~eT, a HMeHHO -- ~YlHTb aroHmo npoTyxmero Te~Ia ("TprUIHeBeH eCMb: H -- cMepjIHT"), 3 HI/TaN B HeM i~oJ~3arottlyto "qepBIIByIO CTalO" MOHX ~ortomaI~mXCZ HepBOB, IIItTaeMI, IX "TeMIIepaMeHTOM"; He y6HaaeMs i "qep- Bn" ; ~iorn6aioT OHH JIrIm~, OT rono~y; MOTKHO HX yMOpHTB; a )IJII/ 9TOrO -- nocKopef i yMepeT~: MeHbme TpeneTa, o ; lymeBneuna, na~e)r; ls~, n rp~ 3paq- KOB H rpa~aunf i ~yi J /eBnefimr~x, HItTI~MHe~IIIIIX h~eCTOB: "HHTIJMHOCTH" -- no~a3naa nnnnna nepBz; no~nnHn~n~ interieur eCTb cKeJIeT: nnaeapHoe Teno MOe C 06rJIo~IaHHbIU M~/COM, K KOTOpOUy npnnenn~ac~ ; lyma, 3acnoHaa HM ; lyx.

    (I)aKT ecTr~ qbaI

  • 'MbwnU u~ aenu' Anc)pen Eenoeo 91

    O~IalKHOBeHHO, Mini qyBCTByeM B 3TttX npoueccax ce6a pa3~BOeliHI~IMH: HeqTO TeqeT, KaK IlpoI~ecc B Hac, I4 HeqTo CTOIIT HeIIO~Brl)KHO Ha]I llpo- rlCXO~III/JIM IIpoI~eCCOM; rl -- Ha6jllo~aeM, rl IIOMHHM; 3TO HeqTO eCTI, TO, qTO Ha3blBaeM MbI HammrlM "5I"; II OHO ]IaHO HaM, KaK CTOJtlILee HeliO~Brl)KHO B o6naqKe r13 u~icjle~; caioco3oarlr le Hallie ~ Hac TaKoao.

    B CTparlllOi rl pe~KOi y311aorlrl ("5t eCMS 5t") )lejlo 06CTOIIT BoBce He TaK: Ha6jllO)imOli~ee HerlIO)~Bri>KHO IlpolIecc ilepe>KrlBaHrlfl HalIIeFO CaMOCO- 3HaHrle Hame KaK 6I~I olIycKaeTca B CaMlaI~ llpot~ecc rl CTaHOBrlTC~I Ha MrHOBeHrle TeKyqrlM rlpolIeccoM, ce6~t IIpOHlllLalOII~rlM dO ~lla; rijlrl BepHee: l lepexllBa~omn~ IIOTOK llo~illrlMaeTc~l BBepx H, He I lperpamaa ~IBrl~KeHrl~ CBOHX, CTaHOBHTCJt cauoco3nallrleM; UHOrOOqrlT~,Ie op~IrlHl~ie Kp~,Im, a, nIrI- palOlarle B )IyXOBHI, IX IIpOCTpaHCTBaX, KOTOpl, Ie OTKpI, IBalOTC~I "5[", KaK Brly- TprI ero 3aKjllOtIeHH[,Ie, -- TaKOBO COCTO~IrlHe COCTO~IHH~I HaIIleFO, KaK ~bI S~IBOpo~ellHOrO Harl3narlKy.

    B 3TOM MoMeliTe y3Hanlla, qTO "5I -- 5I". ~TO eCTl~ rlHTyrlIIrl~I; e~rlHCTBeHHa~I IIHTyrlIIH~I, HaM ~IOCTyIIHa.'I rl3pe)I-

    Ka B HaIlleM 06bIqrlOM CBH)~aHIIrl, eCTb 3Ta:

    "Yl - Yl"...

    F[o cpaBHeHrlIO C 3THM OCTpblM MOMeHTOM yBHaHrlJt "~I", HalIIe O6bIq- Hoe "~I" llpe)IcTaeT KaK He "5I", a KaK IIpOCTOe "conpoBo~eHr le" BblCKa3bI- BaHrl~ ("~I nommea", "~ CKaSan"); llamme O6blqHOe "~I" -- TeHeBOe; OHO CoIIpO- BOXc~aeT qyBCTBeHHbI~ rl IIOjIqac MaTeprlaJIbHbI~ npouecc, nporlcxo;Iamrlfi B HepBllO~ opranrl3almrl llallieR, KOTOpaa eCTb Kllmmellne qepae~ (HepBoB), rlCTaqHBalOIILrlX rHmomee aamme MaCO; rl TaKOe "fl" ("~" O6blqH0e) eCTb rlJI- mo3rla, TeHb, nepeceKaIomaa llefi3axrl CO311aHnnZ rl oT6pacblBaeiaa IIO;I- JIrlHHblM "~" (6eJlblM rojly6eM), npojleTatomrlM Be-into qepe3 IIpOCTpalicTBa qrlCTOrO )Iyxa; ero TeHb -- qepnLIfi BaroH -- rlarl 06blqHOe "a" )XOJIXHO B Hac IIOrrl6HyTl,: e iy cliaceHrla HeT.

    Ero KOHKpeTrla~ XllSrlb eCTb rlnmosrln; aTO xn3nb MycKyjioB (lle~- 3a~Ke~I CO3HaHri~I), rlCTOqeHHblX qepBflMrl HepBoB; 3TO qepBH KprlqaT: KpllqllT Kax(~]blH: "5I", "~I"; H OTTOFO-TO llOIlblTKa KOHKpeTri3HpOBaTb "Jt" O6blqHOe (e~mHCTBO CaMOCO311aHHa, ~IallHoro HaM) npllaO~rlT JIIIIIIL K pa3~BOeHmo, pacTpoerlmo (paccTp0~cTBy), pa3MrlOXeHmo B llac Halifax "a"; u~i omy- maeM TOF)Ia TOJIbKO xop ~BOHrlrlKOB; BOT OHrl ClIOp~IT B Hac: CllOprlT rle "~I", a KOrllomialiirlec~i B rlac HepBbI, IIpOCTpaHCTBa KOTOpblX ilepeceKaeT HeMa~ 6e3rJIacHa~, COl ipoBo~aloman rlx qepllan TeHb ("a" O6blqHOe); II0 ee rl neT BOBCe; eCTb "5I", rlCKOHrl )KrlBylILee B ~yxe; B pe~Krle MrlHyTbI OH ollycKaeTca aHII3; BMeCTO TeHU (conpoBox~aa~omero B~CKaa~manlla "a") noaa~IaeTca qy)~ecHaa xrl3n~ rlHTymmrl ("5I" --"YI"); IIO~a "a" He llorrl6rly, lle ilpe- apamyc~ B creneT, He omymy cKeneTOi CaOrli, qTO a CJIrlT CO Bce~o 3eiJIefi,

  • 92 AaeccanOpo KoMeaJlU

    tie on lymy a, ~TO " I / " OT2IeJIeHO OT I, ICIIapeHIIfi /lymeBHbIX, /IO TeX hOp "I[ - I-Ie 5[".

    I1PHMEqAHII / t

    Ha CTI4XOTBOpeHH~I A. C. FIylIIKHHa '19 OKT~16p.q' (1825). "KepeHKIT' - npeHe6pe~rrreJibHoe HMeHOBaHHe Ka3saqefiCKllX 3HaKOB 20 i~ 40-py6~eBoro ~IOCTOttHCTBa, BI, InyCKaBttIHXC~I OFpOMHblMH THpa~aMH Bpe- MeHHblM rlpaBnTenbCTBOM C aBrycTa 1917 r.; Ha3BaHHe - rio qbaMr~m~ Mn- nncTpa-Flpe~ce~iaTenfl BpeMeHnoro 1-IpaanTenbcTBa AneKcaHJtpa q)ejIopoBH- qa KepeHcKoro (1881-1970). Cp.: "FocImjln, yme cMepj1HT, qeTBepo~lHeSeH 6O eCTb" -- H3 JmTyprnqeCKOfi cnyz(6r~l Ha JIa3apeay cy66oTy. OqeBH~IHO, Be~bifi KonTaMrmHpoBa~ BocKpe- menrte JIa3ap~ Ha qeTBepwbI~ )l(~Hb 14 BocI~pecenHe XpHcTa Ha TpeTtI~. OTCbIJIKa K CTItXOTBOpeHHIO (7/). H. TtoTqeBa "TeHIt CH3bIe CMeC~rlrtCb..." (1830-e).

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