It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia The Gang become...a Gang

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    Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia "The Gang become...a Gang"

    By

    Joel Cleverdon(Blueprint 4 - Question 1)

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    FADE IN:

    BLACK SCREEN

    SUPER: WEDNESDAY 10:00AM

    INT. PADDYS PUB - DAY

    SUPER:"12:00 P.M - On a Monday - Philadelphia ,PA"

    OPEN as FRANK enters the pub to see an exhausted DENNIS andMAC slumped over the bar playing on a games console.

    FRANKHave you both been playing on thisthing since yesterday? I bought it

    for the customers, not for you two.

    DENNISShut up Frank, were trying toconcentrate here!

    MACWeve nearly completed the game.

    Frank looks at the TV screen which shows two men (Dennis andMac) running around a virtual city murdering and robbingpassing civilians.

    FRANKWhat is this shit?

    MACWell, for one thing it is notshit and for the third its aboutgangs and taking what you wantwithout consequences. So thatimmediately makes it cool.

    FRANKBut why do it on this thing whenyou can have twice as much fundoing it in real life?

    DENNISLike Mac said, consequences.

    FRANKIf youre good enough you donthave to deal with the consequences.

    (MORE)

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 2.

    FRANK (contd)Me and my gang never had to dealwith consequences and we got up tosome crazy illegal shit.

    MACFrank, your gang just sing and have

    heart attacks. Whatever, Frank juststop talking to us.

    FRANKAnyway, when have you two ever beenconcerned with the consequences ofyour actions?

    Dennis and Mac look at eachother as if to say hes right,when have we?

    CHARLIE and DEE enter the pub squabbling as they take a seatat the bar.

    CHARLIE(shouting)

    I know what I saw Dee!

    DEECharlie please stop shouting!

    CHARLIE(continues shouting)

    But you think Im crazy!

    DEE

    Charlie, to be honest I thought youwere crazy before you told me this.

    We see Dennis, Mac and Frank staring at Charlie and Dee withlooks of a confused nature.

    DENNIS(to Dee)

    Whats Charlie claiming he saw thistime?

    DEEA unicorn.

    DENNISReally Charlie?

    CHARLIEHey, I saw it! it was big andpurple.

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 3.

    MACPurple? Charlie, unicorns arentpurple they are crystal white.

    CHARLIEYeah, How do you know?

    MACBecause unlike you Ive actuallyseen one. In fact I have rode one.

    CHARLE(fascinated)

    Wait. Could it talk and if so whatsort of accent did it have becauseIve always imagined that it wouldsound exactly like Billy Ray Cyrus?

    DENNIS

    (breaks up conversation)Billy Ray-- what? Okay this isinsane talk.

    (turns to the game)Mac, back to the game, ignore theseidiots.

    Dennis and Mac turn back to the screen and continue playingon the game.

    DEEWow, really Dennis? I mean I expectit from Mac but not you.

    DENNISAdults play games too Dee.

    DEEYeah theyre called virgins.

    Dennis turns to stare intensely into Dees eyes making herfeel very uncomfortable.

    DENNIS(annoyed)

    Dee, you of all people should knowIm not a virgin.

    DEEWhat?

    Dennis turns off the console.

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 4.

    MAC(confused)

    Dude, we were so close to finishingthat!

    DENNIS

    (enthusiastic)Oh that doesnt matter anymore Macbecause we are going to be our owngame.

    MAC(excited)

    Were making our own game?!

    DENNISWhat? no, were starting our owngang.

    FRANKYes! Ive always wanted to be in agang.

    DENNISYeah, not you Frank.

    END TEASER

    ACT 1

    INT. PADDYS PUB - LATER

    Dee and Charlie stand staring at a PURPLE RODEO BULL MACHINEwhich is taking up most of the room at the center of thebar.

    DEE(shouts)

    Frank!

    Frank comes scurrying out of the bathroom.

    FRANKWhat? I was in the middle ofcleaning my pipe.

    CHARLIEYour Pipe?

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 5.

    FRANKOh I meant "the" yes "the pipe."

    Dee knows what Frank was doing and shes disgusted.

    CHARLIE

    (oblivious)Oh, well thats "Charlie work", Iwould of given you a hand.

    FRANKThanks for the offer Charlie but itisnt that big.

    (starts to laugh)

    CHARLIEWhat? How small is this pipe?

    Frank hops onto the rodeo horse acting like an excited kid

    in a playground.

    DEEFrank, come on! First the gamethingy and now this?

    FRANK(enthusiastic)

    Dee, think about it. This is a goldmine. The customers will drink,ride this, throw up and then buyeven more drink!

    CHARLIEOh thats what this is, this is theunicorn.

    DEECharlie, its a rubber bull.

    CHARLIEYes I know but...

    (shouts)Ha, Im not crazy!

    INT. CLOTHES SHOP - DAY

    We see Dennis and Mac walking through a large clothes store.

    DENNISIf we want to be a gang togetherweve got to dress like a gang.

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 8.

    DENNISThis is completely funny butinappropriate.

    (unplugs the machine)

    Charlie is thrown behind the bar, smashing into the glassesand bottles.

    BLACK SCREEN

    ACT 2

    SUPER: THURSDAY 10:00AM

    INT. HOSPITAL - MORNING

    We see an unconscious looking Charlie lying in a hospitalbed.

    The gang are standing around looking genuinely concerned.

    MACShit, is he going to be okay.

    DENNIS(now unconcerned)

    Hell be fine, its Charlie, herummages through diseased trash ona daily basis, and hes

    (beat)always at least stable.

    FRANKWell, Ive got to get back to thebar.

    (more)

    They all look at Frank outraged by his lack of concern forCharlie.

    FRANK(CONTD)

    Its what he would of wanted.

    DEEYoure talking like hes dead orsomething.

    A doctor enters with a clipboard in hand.

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 10.

    DENNISThis is our gang identity. Werethe Phili Mexicans.

    DEEBut youre not Mexican?

    MACI told you these werent gooduniforms.

    DENNISWell, you didnt want the leatherjackets.

    FRANKThis priceless.

    Dee and Frank burst out laughing as they high fiveeachother.

    CHARLIE(to Dennis and Mac)

    Do I get my own poncho?

    Dennis pulls out a colourful poncho from beneath Charliesbed.

    Charlies eyes light up with pure joy.

    FRANK(laughing)

    Now youre the three queer-keteers!

    MACYeah well well show you how gay weare, when we...

    (looks to Dennis)

    DENNISRob a bank!

    INT. PADDYS PUB - LATER

    We see Dennis, Charlie and Mac dressed in a stereotypicalwhite and black burglars uniforms.

    MACDennis, dont you think theseuniforms are a bit...

    (beat)obvious.

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 11.

    CHARLIEYeah, it looks like were in fancydress.

    DENNISExactly, so when we enter the bank

    theyll assume were just peopledressed up as burglars but infactwere burglars dressed up asburglars.

    MACOh, so were double bluffing them.

    DENNISExactly!

    Dee and Frank enter dressed in proper high tech "missionimpossible" style uniforms.

    DENNIS(to Dee and Frank)Come on Dee, what is this?

    DEEWell Dennis, anything you can do Iwill do better.

    DENNISSo youre going to rob a bankaswell? why?

    DEEHm,

    (looks at Frank for an answer)because...

    FRANKBasically were bored.

    MACSo, let me get this straight,youre going to rob a bank becauseyoure bored?

    FRANKYoure only doing it to prove yourgangs not gay.

    MACIncorrect, because we aredefinitely not

    (beat)

    (MORE)

    (CONTINUED)

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    CONTINUED: 12.

    MAC (contd)a gay gang.

    CHARLIE(shouts)

    Stop arguing, remember who this is

    about!(more)

    They all look at Charlie as if to say "who?"

    CHARLIE(CONTD)

    Me!

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